Phénix V — Album Track 09
Album: Ce qu’il reste de moi
Official release: 21 October 2026
Everything I Had
What happens when you lose almost everything you have worked your entire life to build?
For years, I had built everything I had ever longed for. A family, a home, businesses, and the security of knowing that the people I loved would never have to go without.
I had devoted my life to it.
And suddenly, everything fell apart.
It wasn’t just my relationships. My home, my work, my financial security, and the future I had spent years building were all thrown into uncertainty.
I went from a life in which I had built so much to suddenly finding myself without even a home of my own.
I slept in a camper van, later stayed in a warehouse, and even spent four months living in my work van.
Eventually, I found a small apartment, mainly so I could once again give my daughter a stable place to call home.
But having a roof over your head and truly feeling at home are two very different things.
Even when I return to my former house today, it no longer feels like the home I once knew.
And yet, in the middle of all that chaos, there were moments when I unexpectedly found myself able to breathe more freely again.
Not because the loss hurt any less, but because I was slowly beginning to realize that possessing everything and truly feeling at home are not necessarily the same thing.
Today, I am trying to rebuild my life. I am working again, creating stability again, and trying to move forward one step at a time.
But what once felt like the natural foundation of my life has still not returned.
Tout ce que j’avais is about losing almost everything I had spent so many years building.
About the difference between having a house and truly belonging somewhere. And about the question of whether, even if you one day get everything back, you can also recover the person you once were and the life you used to know.
I knew how to build a life.
But I never imagined that one day I would have to start again with almost nothing.
Lyrics
Read the complete original French lyrics.(English translation)
J’avais encore les clés
I still had the keys
Mais plus vraiment la maison
But not really the home anymore
Je pouvais ouvrir la porte
I could still open the door
Sans retrouver l’impression
Without finding that feeling again
D’entrer chez moi
Of coming home
Les murs étaient les mêmes
The walls were still the same
Les pièces n’avaient pas bougé
The rooms hadn’t changed
Mais quelque chose était parti
But something was gone
Que je ne pouvais pas remplacer
Something I couldn’t replace
Je rentrais chez moi
I was going home
Sans rentrer chez moi
Without truly coming home
Tout était encore là
Everything was still there
Et pourtant
And yet
Plus rien n’était pareil
Nothing was the same anymore
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Glissait entre mes mains
Was slipping through my fingers
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Une maison, des projets, demain
A home, plans, a future
Je croyais perdre ma vie
I thought I was losing my life
À chaque chose qui disparaissait
With everything that disappeared
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Et je ne savais plus
And I no longer knew
Ce qu’il restait de moi
What was left of me
Les habitudes
The routines
Les certitudes
The certainties
Les choses qu’on ne regarde même plus
The things you no longer even notice
Tant qu’elles sont là
As long as they’re there
Puis un jour
Until one day
Chaque détail devient une question
Every detail becomes a question
Qu’est-ce qui est encore à moi ?
What still belongs to me?
Où est-ce que je rentre maintenant ?
Where do I go home to now?
J’avais passé ma vie
I had spent my life
À construire de la sécurité
Building security
Et tout à coup
And suddenly
Même le mot “chez moi”
Even the word “home”
Avait changé
Had changed its meaning
Je savais reconstruire
I knew how to rebuild
Réparer
To repair
Recommencer
To start again
Mais je ne savais pas encore
But I didn’t yet know
Où poser ma vie
Where to settle my life
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Glissait entre mes mains
Was slipping through my fingers
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Une maison, des projets, demain
A home, plans, a future
Je croyais perdre ma vie
I thought I was losing my life
À chaque chose qui disparaissait
With everything that disappeared
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Et je ne savais plus
And I no longer knew
Ce qu’il restait de moi
What was left of me
Pendant un temps
For a while
J’ai vécu avec presque rien
I lived with almost nothing
Quelques affaires
A few personal belongings
Un endroit pour dormir
A place to sleep
Et la route devant moi
And the road ahead of me
C’était étrange
It was strange
J’avais perdu tant de choses
I had lost so much
Et pourtant certains matins
And yet, on some mornings
Je respirais mieux
I could breathe more freely
Je ne savais pas pourquoi
I didn’t know why
Je ne voulais pas encore
I wasn’t ready yet
Donner un nom à ça
To give it a name
Puis il fallait recommencer
Then I had to start again
Une adresse
An address
Des clés
Keys
Des factures
Bills
Des obligations
Responsibilities
Reconstruire encore
Rebuilding once again
Parce qu’il faut bien vivre quelque part
Because you have to live somewhere
Mais parfois
But sometimes
Quand je ferme la porte derrière moi
When I close the door behind me
Je me demande encore
I still wonder
Si avoir un endroit
Whether having a place
Et avoir un chez-soi
And having a home
C’est vraiment la même chose
Are really the same thing
Je pensais que perdre mes affaires
I thought losing my belongings
C’était perdre ma vie
Meant losing my life
Je ne savais pas encore
I didn’t yet understand
Ce qui appartenait vraiment à l’une
What truly belonged to one
Et ce qui appartenait
And what belonged
À l’autre
To the other
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
A changé de place ou disparu
Has moved or disappeared
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
N’est plus ce que j’avais connu
Is no longer what I once knew
Je pourrais tout reconstruire
I could rebuild everything
Je l’ai déjà fait tant de fois
I’ve done it so many times before
Mais si demain je récupère tout
But if tomorrow I got everything back
Est-ce que je retrouverai
Would I also find
Celui que j’étais là-bas ?
The person I used to be back there?
Tout ce que j’avais
Everything I had
Et cette question
And that one question
Qu’est-ce qui reste de moi ?
What is left of me?
J’ai encore des clés
I still have keys
J’ai encore une porte
I still have a door
J’ai encore un endroit
I still have a place
Où rentrer
To return to
Mais certains soirs
But on some evenings
Je reste quelques secondes
I pause for a few seconds
Avant d’entrer
Before going inside
Et je me demande
And I wonder
Où est passé
Where it has gone
Chez moi
That feeling of home
Listen to Tout ce que j’avais
Tout ce que j’avais is the ninth track from Phénix V’s album Ce qu’il reste de moi.
The full album will be released on 21 October 2026 across streaming platforms.
Want to listen as soon as it is released? You can already pre-save the album on Spotify.
Ce qu’il reste de moi — Spotify Pre-Save
From 21 October 2026, direct listening links to Spotify, Apple Music, YouTube Music, and other streaming platforms will be added here.
Phénix V — Tout ce que j’avais
Album: Ce qu’il reste de moi
Release date: 21 October 2026